Saturday, December 01, 2012

Headlines You DIDN'T See During Champions Week

Despite a battalion of media members covering virtually every aspect of NASCAR Sprint Cup Series Champion’s Week in Las Vegas, there were a number of stories that somehow slipped in below the radar, posssibly because none of them are true...

Fatback is back!
McSwain Returns: Former Joe Gibbs and Wood Brothers Racing crew chief Michael “Fatback” McSwain is set to return to the Sprint Cup garage next season. McSwain has been absent from the sport since stepping down as crew chief for Wood Brothers/JTG Racing at the end of the 2007 season, but revealed this week that he will field a new team in the full, 36-race Sprint Cup schedule next year, with sponsorship from Ben and Jerry’s.

The Vermont-based ice cream maker will finance the sponsorship through sales of a special new flavor, “Fastback,” vanilla ice cream laced with bacon fat, hot dog slices and licorice-flavored jellybeans.

Bowyer, Gordon Cease Hostilities: Clint Bowyer arrived in Las Vegas still steaming over the Phoenix International Raceway crash that saw his championship hopes end with an intentional trip into the Turn Four wall, courtesy of Jeff Gordon.

The two did not speak during any of the Champion’s Week activities, with Bowyer refusing to even make eye contact. Reports yesterday indicated that Bowyer had finally agreed to “bury the hatchet” after a number of post-banquet cocktails, but the Kansas native insisted today that he was quoted out of context.

 “I agreed to bury the hatchet,” said Bowyer. “In his back!!”

It's been a loooong week...
Keso’s Gotta Go: NASCAR’s championship festivities took an unfortunate – though predictable – turn at approximately 3:15 AM Saturday, when newly crowned champion Brad Keselowski was spotted using the NASCAR Sprint Cup trophy as a urinal.

Keselowski declined to comment directly on the incident today, but tweeted, “Been holding it since Letterman show. 39 cases of recycled Miller Lite got 2 go somewhere.”

Flying Solo: While his fellow drivers shared last night’s NASCAR Sprint Cup Series Awards Banquet with their wives or girlfriends, Keselowski went solo. The Penske Racing driver had reportedly lined-up a date earlier in the week, but cancelled those plans after an unfortunate wardrobe misunderstanding.

“He asked the woman if she had a designer gown to wear to the banquet,” revealed a source close to Keselowski. “When she replied, `I have a Wang,’ things went downhill pretty quickly.”

Photos: Jim Garrahan Photo/Clint Bowyer


  1. Anonymous11:28 AM

    Not a blown tire, blown engine, lap lost to running out of gas, horsepower as good as if not better than Hendrick's stable, and Penske thinks going to Ford is worth the effort.

    Dollar bills sure do blind the smartest among us.

  2. Sad to see Brad doing a "Truex."

  3. Anonymous6:19 PM

    "Sad to see Brad doing a "Truex.""

    What does that mean?

  4. They said..... Wang

  5. Moody, lol....that's just wrong